either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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