Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
