Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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