Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
