Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
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