walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
