He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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