aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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