"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Just pee around me
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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