I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
