I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize