i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
