I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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