How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
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He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
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all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
how drunk are you?