I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
