This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
