Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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