Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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