Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
