Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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