Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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