it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
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