Yo dont text me then not text me
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize