Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize