Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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