I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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