I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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