That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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