I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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