Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
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it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
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We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.