Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
