do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
