So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
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I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
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My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night