I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic