It's like God shit irony all over that family
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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