I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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