Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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