Nicole vs. Life
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
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you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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