I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I think my fart just growled at me.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Randomize
