dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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