Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Randomize
