It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
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I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
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I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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