I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But break dance skills will only take you so far
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize