So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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