why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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