look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
