i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We have started to decorate penises.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
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