he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
