I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
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