I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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